Final Essay Comparison and Contrast
Topic: Analyze and discuss your abilities as a student or what you perceive your attributes to be as compared to what you actually presented/achieved/accomplished in ENG-101/101A this semester.
5 paragraphs
Hi. This is a copy of a compare and contrast essay my teacher sent us that she did. After the essay, ill include what she sent about the essay that she wrote.
I’m just sending this to show what she expects from a compare and contrast essay.
Comparison and Contrast
Point-by-Point
By Lisa Smith
Once upon a time, there were two brothers, Edgar and Allan, who were identical twins. Many believed that these identical twins were clones of each other who not only looked alike, talked alike, and acted alike, but were the same in every area of life. This stereotypical belief was anything but the truth. Just because Edgar and Allan came from one zygote which made them part of a two-for-one package, it did not predispose them to be the same in every way, and they werent. Both men, though, did share and did experience differences in their religious beliefs, careers, and attitudes.
The first area in which both brothers shared and differed was religion. Both young men were taught to believe that there was a higher power who created them and every molecule in the universe. While both boys were raised in this type of religious household, it was only Edgar who actually carried that belief system forward into his adult life. Not only did Edgar believe this, he embraced it through every action in his life. For example, it was Edgar who gave thanks every day in prayerful conversation with his Creator. He also participated in weekly and holiday services giving thanks. On the other hand, there was Edgars identical twin, Allan. Even though Allan was raised along with his brother in the same household with the same ideas, Allan did not buy into the belief system of overt action. He did believe that there was a deity, but, as he matured, he did not attend any kind of celebratory service as did his family. Since Allan was not an overt person, he, nevertheless, could stand his ground. When he was chastised by this family for his wayward actions, Allan liked to quote Don Williamss lyric Heaven does not wait for those only who congregate from the song I Believe in You as a response to diffuse the touchy situation. He felt that the less said the better.
Another aspect of the brothers lives in which they shared and differed was their career paths. Both Edgar and Allan were highly educated. Moreover, they aspired to be engineers, and, in the same manner, obtained their degrees and worked at their crafts. However, after several years of working as an engineer, Edgar became bored with the constant analysis and drudgery. He quit his job in order to pursue his passion for photography. It was in this field that Edgars true creativity and love of life grew. For example, he eventually opened a photography center and became known worldwide for his pictorial montages of life in motion. In contrast to Edgars burgeoning new career, Allan lost his engineering job to budget cuts and became unemployed. Unlike his brother, Allan refused to explore his own passion and new identity for fear of failure. He could have followed his healthful lifestyle passion and developed innovative ways to create vegetarian dishes. He could have listened to the encouragement of his friends and become a chef. Instead, he remained unemployed and unfulfilled.
The last area in which the brothers connected and diverged was attitude. It was in this area that a true sense of each man could be felt. Both Edgar and Allan were open minded and welcomed diversity in every aspect of life. They adhered to the belief that all people and creatures were unique with unique desires, drives, and ideas who could propel the world forward. While both brothers had this positive mindset towards others, it was only Edgar who believed this of himself as well. Edgar felt that he had the potential to better himself and to help the world around him. This was seen, for example, when Edgar changed careers. He believed that he could, and so he did. He learned, made mistakes, learned from those mistakes, and built a thriving career in photography. Through it all, he never stopped giving of his time and money to those in need. Although Allan shared the same attitude towards people, for example, he volunteered and gave of his time to others, he did not subscribe to that notion for himself. His lack of belief in himself kept him standing in one place. His personal fear of failure did not allow him to look beyond what he was.
Once upon a time, there were two identical twin brothers, Edgar and Allan, who were the same at the onset in their religious beliefs, careers, and attitudes, yet, as they naturally developed, they branched out in these same areas of life. This story, though, is not finished. It is true that of the two brothers, it was Edgar who was steadfast and outgoing in each key area of his life. He was the one who was ardent and determined to achieve. It may appear that he was the successful one, instead, it is Allan who may well finish the story for the world. He may be the one to be the most successful. It may be he who shows the world that there is hope and possibility for those who have fear. He may show the world that anything is possible if someone just keeps putting one foot in front of the other. He will end the story in his usual quiet way. He will once again enter a marathon as he has done on countless other occasions. He will put one foot in front of the other and will endure pain, sweat, and even tears. He, as always, will run forward to the finish line. He believes he will finish; therefore, he does. There is hope. There is possibility. There is no end to this story. There is only a start.
That was my professors example compare and contrast essay.
This is her explanation of the essay. You can see how it has to be revised a bit.
Edgar and Allan Explanation
The comparison AND contrast essay, I believe, is self-explanatory, but just in case you may not quite get the points, allow me to further explain.
1. The thesis states that this is a true comparison AND contrast essay. You may use the words comparison and contrast, or you may use similar words as I did. See the underlined words. I do this in every paragraph.
2. Note the order in the thesis. I begin with Edgar and then I follow with Allan. That is the sequential order that I use throughout.
3. Another note to see is that I begin each paragraph with the all-important transition. I also state the overall point of the essay; I use the appropriate C/C verbiage, and then I give the subtopic.
4. I begin each paragraph stating how the brothers are similar, and then I go back and forth between the brothers showing similarities and then differences. This is Alternating Patten or Point-by-Point.
5. You will note the underlined transitions that take the reader between the brothers. Those transitions show either similarities or divergences.
6. Also note that each time a similarity and contrast is given, an appropriate example with an explanation is given. This harkens back to Expository and EVERYTHIG that you have written thus far.
7. Finally, see the conclusion. I kept the voice third person throughout; I did not add a personal opinion. I personally felt the essay was stronger by my keeping it in third person and adding new information. Not once in the essay did I mention that Allan was a runner. Not once did I mention that he entered races, yet in the end I did. I did not have to explain his races, wins, or failures. I did not have to give examples. I did have to try to end on a positive note, and I used his perseverance as the positive ending.
8. C/C essay writing is Expository writing except writing about one person or one thing, you are now writing about two. If you had done a C/C with Job A and Job B, you would have figured out pretty quickly that Job B was the way to go.
You now know the routine. It is up to you to create your Comparison AND Contrast. I emphasize the AND because this MUST be both. It cannot just be about the positives or the negatives. It must be about both.
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